Holiday traditions.
A group text went out last week detailing just our neighborhood holiday schedule between our family and our two best friend families. It’s…busy. Any other time of year, I’d balk at the idea of having so many things going on so many days in a row, but the weeks leading up to Christmas are my weeks. I thrive.
Why? This is a two-fold answer. Number one, the magic of Christmas is so important to me. Number two, I realize that as a mom, I am the magic of Christmas to my family. It’s all the little things I (and my husband) do during the Christmas season that bring such joy and magic into the lives of our kids, and that, in return, is what brings so much joy and magic into my own life.
Over the years, we’ve adopted so many amazing holiday traditions – but if you ask the Raiford children, there are some holiday traditions that stand out.
Christmas Decorating
I am full in on Halloween. Love fall. Love Halloween. Love the décor and the spooky season and trick or treating with the kids. Until the sun comes up on November 1. Then it’s Christmas. Our kids thrive on decorating our home for Christmas – this house was made for Christmas decorations. Actually – fun story – we bought this house because the entire front half of our house has 23-foot ceilings that are just meant for a massive Christmas tree as well as a staircase that thrives when wrapped in garland. Okay, I bought this house for those reasons, my husband will tell you he chose this house for different reasons, but we’d have purchased this house even if he’d hated it simply because of the Christmas tree room. He knows it. I know it.
But back to the point. We decorate on November 1. Why? Because it takes several days to decorate our home. We have 15 Christmas trees (though only the one in the Christmas tree room is massive…the rest are normal-sized trees). Each room has its own tree, including all of the bedrooms. All of the bathrooms are fully decorated. Both living rooms, the kitchen and the dining room and office and the pool deck and the front porch and the staircase and the staircase landing, and all the kids’ bedrooms and all the bathrooms and the lounge and all the plant shelves and windows and doors…it’s a lot of work, and it’s time-consuming. We like to start early so we can enjoy the hard work we put into it.
The kids love decorating their own trees and bedrooms. They love helping us decorate the big tree as a family and hanging the stockings. More importantly, they love sitting down at the end of the night and seeing the Christmas lights twinkle while we watch our first Christmas movie of the year.
Annual “Hallmark Movie Tree Lighting” Weekend Away
When the twins were three in 2017, we decided we needed a weekend break after Thanksgiving. We host in our home, we cook the entire meal, and we are typically exhausted afterward, and we wanted a break. We are huge Omni hotel fans, so we decided to book a weekend trip at the Omni Amelia Island Resort – and it changed Thanksgiving weekend forever.
We had no idea when we went that the hotel has an annual tree lighting ceremony straight out of a Hallmark movie. The resort has a charming little town square with a charming little pond surrounded by a wooden walkway, shops, restaurants, a spa, etc. Santa comes in, the countdown happens, the tree is lit by the water, kids make and decorate cookies with the hotel chefs, there’s an elf hunt, visits with Santa and the Mrs., ornament making, hot chocolate stations, s’mores making, snow, letters to Santa writing, and every few steps there is a table with hotel staff manning full bars for the adults to enjoy while the kids are having the time of their lives. The air is cool, the lights are perfect, and it’s lovely.
Did I mention that every year at check in, staff stand by the lobby tree overlooking the Atlantic Ocean handing out Christmas cookies to the children and Christmas cocktails to the adults? There’s a specialty drink every year – and it’s always amazing. The lobby also features a hot chocolate bar for the kids, and it’s just our favorite holiday weekend. It is pure magic, and it’s one of our favorite annual getaways.
That Motherfucking Elf
Listen, I despise the elf with every ounce of my soul, but the twins still love that little bastard, so he’s back on December 1 every single year. For the past 13 years, we have been humbled by a stuffed animal for exactly 25 days and nights during what is otherwise the most magical time of year. We have a year to plan for this little fucker’s return, but do we? No. Do we ever learn from our 5 am “oh FUCK the elf didn’t move” efforts? Also no. Do we get creative with the elf? Another no from me.
We had one good year – ONE good year – with the elf in 2022. It was the year our oldest decided she’d had enough elf disappointment and mediocrity, and she told us she’s got it. She did something amazing with that demon spawn every single night while we toasted her. But guess what? One year of being the Elf bitch and she gave up last year.
But the kids love the elf. So every year, he shows up to ruin our late nights and early mornings on December 1. He puts forth all his creative effort on that night by bringing the new advent calendar and matching family pajamas for the family. After that…well, he just relocates. Yet the twins still love his boring ass.
The Boat Parade
All right, all right – we are Floridians. We live on the coast, so we have a Christmas boat parade. One of our absolute favorite family traditions is going to our darling Sue’s house (she is Craig’s bonus mom, and she’s amazing) on Kings Bay to watch the boat parade. What we love about this evening is that all our favorite people are there. The company is spectacular, the menu is spectacular, the cocktails are spectacular. The boat parade is always a fun night, and the kids love being at Sue’s house.
Santa Night
A few nights before Christmas, my husband and I host the most important man of the hour in our home. Santa and Mrs. Clause come to visit. We invite all of our friends over, we all wear matching family Christmas pajamas, and we eat, drink, and Santa surprises the kids. Santa and Mrs. Clause come over, sit by the tree in the Christmas tree room, read a Christmas story, visit each child individually, and then visit with each family so we can all take photos with the couple of the hour. It is the single most fun party of the year for these kids – even all of “our” teens (because even the ones who are not Raifords by name are Raifords because they are still ours) are excited about it every year.
Santa hands out gifts to each of the kids, and it’s just a magical evening to kickstart Christmas week. I think we had 54 people last year, and it was so much fun. The memories made on this evening are nothing short of magical.
Framily Gift Exchange/Christmas Lights Hayride
On the eve of Christmas Eve, our neighborhood framily gathers to have an amazing meal. We exchange presents with the adults and children, and then we load up on the trailer with chairs and blankets and warm beverages, and we spend the evening riding around our beautiful neighborhood looking at Christmas lights. It’s one of the most fun evenings of the year because it’s so casual. We don’t have to leave the ‘hood, and we get to wear our comfy clothes and make sweet memories with our families. We’ve become such a family over the years, and it makes things that much more special for all of us.
Christmas Eve
Ahhh…my favorite day of the year. Every one of our Christmas traditions has a special place in my heart, but this is the one I love the most because it’s the one when I get to make the most memories with my family.
On Christmas Eve, we sleep in a bit. I sit and enjoy my coffee with my husband. It’s usually cold, so we take blankets onto the pool deck to do so. Afterward, it’s time for Christmas pajamas, Christmas music, and fun. We prep the stuffing for Christmas day along with all of the breakfast dishes that are baked when we wake up on Christmas morning.
We open a bottle of champagne, and we make homemade sugar cookies with the kids. The Christmas cookie cutters come out – as do the sprinkles and the frosting. The kids decorate all the cookies for Santa, and then we move on to baking all of our Christmas day goodies. Cookies and sweet treats galore. We order dinner, watch a Christmas movie together, and go to bed happy and excited about the following morning. It is truly the best day. It’s just us. It’s simple. It’s slow. It gives us time as a family since we also host our families on Christmas day at home.
Bonus Traditions
These aren’t family traditions – the kids are not present, but they are magical for me and that’s still a tradition. First – my husband and I get to sneak away for a quick weekend in Tampa in December for his company Christmas party. Sure, I’m not big on people or socializing, etc. but it is the one time a year my husband sees his colleagues in person, and I love how excited they get to see one another and how much they love and respect him, and that’s good enough for me. But, truly, what I love is brunch and Christmas shopping with him in addition to being able to sneak away for a weekend.
And last, but certainly not least – Favorite Things. Hands down the most fun evening. But even more than the evening itself is the time leading up to it. The shopping trips with my two best friends to buy all the décor. The millions of texts discussing color schemes, outfits, and our actual favorite things. The decorating the day before. The getting ready and having a pre-party cocktail together before everyone arrives to bask in the brilliance of our spectacular party décor. The fun I have spending the evening with so many women I enjoy, and seeing the thought and effort everyone (well, almost everyone…some people clearly stop on their way to the party and grab whatever they see first and it shows) puts into choosing their favorite things for the year. I love it. It’s just SUCH a great evening, and I love it.
I think the moral of the story is that the holidays are a time when we get to choose what brings us joy, and we get to immerse ourselves into that. And I think it’s the time of year when we get to focus so much on how extremely fortunate we are to have so much and to spend so much time with those who fill our cups and our hearts, and we get to see that it’s truly not about the gifts – even though the kids love that part, they’ll all tell you it’s the time spent together and the memories made that make Christmas magical.
Enjoy this season. Be present. Embrace the little things because they’re the things that matter most. Above all else, don’t forget the real reason for the season, and don’t forget to give thanks for all that you are so blessed to call your own in life.
Tiffany Raiford 