I really, really love being home.
I have never understood people who don’t enjoy their homes, who want to be out all the time, who don’t enjoy just…being home. I mean, let’s be honest: I assume people who don’t like being home are unhappy people looking to keep busy so they don’t have to face the fact that they don’t like their lives, but I’m willing to give some people grace and assume it’s because you don’t know how to make your house feel like a home.
Did your house insult you? Did your couch betray you? Is your kitchen judging you? because I love being home. It’s my favorite place in the entire world to be. I love it. A clean home, comfy clothes, candles burning, my family with me, and my dog curled up next to me while I read a good book? Yeah, I don’t know what’s better than that.
People will say, “I just can’t sit at home. I have to get out,” and I’m like…why?
What’s wrong with your house? Because I know why I love mine so much. For one, it’s where we’ve made the vast majority of our memories as a family. Every Christmas morning. Every Thanksgiving dinner. Every birthday eve and first day of school. So many football Saturdays and hosted dinners, pool parties, and Easters, and so many beautiful memories, and I feel those when I’m home.
Aside from that, I’ve figured out what it is I love so much about my house. I made it feel good to be here. And I don’t mean expensive or perfect. I mean cozy and welcoming. And there is a difference. I have a big house because I have a big family, but I’ve managed to make our house feel cozy, welcoming, calming, and fun all at once.
We have a lot of space. Rooms we don’t use as much as others. But our home doesn’t feel like a showroom. It feels like a home. Our furniture is comfortable. Our artwork is intentionally chosen. Our décor is personal. I don’t choose things for our home that are trendy or popular on the internet. I choose things that make us want to use them. A couch that we can curl up on and watch movies together as a family. Chairs I can sit in with my book and my coffee and enjoy a rainy Saturday morning while the rest of my house sleeps. I like our house spotless, but I don’t like it to feel un-lived in. It’s not sterile, and I think that makes a big difference.
Here’s what I do at home that makes it feel so much cozier, welcoming, and just the kind of place that you never want to leave.
Turn off the damn lights
Overhead lighting? Over my dead body. Big lights are a major no in this house. You won’t find us using the ceiling lights, ever. I use lamps. I like to light the fireplace in the family room and use that as light. We have lamps in every room, and those are used daily to give our house a soft, cozy glow rather than the harsh overhead lights that make it feel like a showroom. We don’t need rooms lit up like operating rooms. That’s scandalous. Give me the soft light of a lamp any day.
Use color
Farmhouse grey. Millennial beige. Stark white. Tan. No. Do not pass. Do not collect $200. Homes need color. I’m not saying you need to paint your rooms every shade of the rainbow. I wouldn’t. My walls are neutral colors. My wood floors are neutral. My cabinets are neutral. My furniture is neutral. But my décor? Color. We have a navy blue fireplace. We have colorful area rugs in every room. We have colorful artwork – and no, it doesn’t match. I hang my grandmother’s paintings (she was a phenomenally talented painter) around our home. I decorate with family photos – and I like the kind that are taken by us when we are traveling and having fun because they are happy.
I like colorful pillows and colorful décor. And it makes our home feel alive. I love bold granite in the kitchens and bathrooms. Give me color. It adds warmth and depth, and it’s so comforting.
Decorate with things that mean something to you
This is where I think people go wrong in their homes that make them feel less like home and more like a sterile environment. Impersonal artwork that’s mass produced hanging all over the walls. Where are your family photos? Where are the pieces of art that speak to you that you don’t see in every single Hobby Lobby in America? Decorate with the things that mean something to you.
The built in shelves in our breakfast nook? Every single shelf has a framed photograph that brings me joy. Our kids with their friends dressed in their Halloween pajamas standing on my front porch. Family photos from our favorite locations around the world. Homecoming photos and prom photos and senior photos and sports photos. Our décor is meaningful to us, and it brings such a sense of calm and happiness when we are home.
Fresh flowers are always perfect
I will die on this hill, but every home should have fresh flowers in at least two to three rooms. I like to keep them on the kitchen island, on the mantle of the fireplace and/or on the coffee table. I like them on the table in the breakfast nook. I like them on the dining room table. I like them on the side table between the chairs in the lounge. I like them on my bedside table. I like fresh flowers in my bathrooms.
You don’t need elaborate floral arrangements, either. You just need flowers. A few roses in a vase. A bouquet of hydrangeas or sunflowers. All you need is fresh flowers because they bring so much happiness and life to each room. I buy most of my flowers at Publix when I’m picking up groceries.
Keep your house clean
Listen, I’m not asking you to make things perfect. I mean, I like them perfect, but I’m an anal retentive obsessive compulsive neat freak. But a clean house is a happy house. No dishes in the sink. No laundry overflowing. No clutter on counters or tables (actually, I don’t like anything on counters). But having a house that’s clean and tidy means you can enjoy being home because you’re not surrounding yourself with things that stress you out.
And trust me, I’m a mom of four and a family of six. If I can keep my house clean, anyone can keep their house clean.
Light candles
A soft scent, preferably scents that pair well with the season, makes a huge difference. I’ve been in beautiful homes in which no on lights candles and it’s so cold and sterile. A beautiful scent can make a huge difference between a house and a home.
And this brings me back to my original point: I like being home. But I think I like being home because my home is the place in which I’m happiest. A place in which I get to be surrounded by things I love, people I love, and memories that bring me joy. Anyone can have a house, but it often does rely on the small touches to make a house a home.
