Yes to all.
The confidence that comes with getting older is absolute beauty. There’s something so freeing about it. It’s gorgeous. I’ve raised (and continue to raise) great kids, I’ve spent a quarter of a decade sharing a last name with the same gorgeous man, and we’ve built a life that young Tiffany only dreamed of building. And once you realize just how good life really is, you realize that there are so many things that no longer matter. And things that do.
At the very young old age of 42, there is so much propaganda that I’m not falling for…but so much that I am absolutely falling for. And I like it. Here’s what I’m embracing at the moment.
Outfit Repeating
If you’ve been around here for a while, you know I like expensive things. Therefore, if I’m spending $300 on a dress, you better believe I’m wearing it more than once. I’m going to wear it as often as I like. I might even buy it in all the colors. I might not even wear it differently every time I wear it because who even cares? It looks good, it feels good, and I’m wearing it as often as I’d like because I feel pretty.
Being Overdressed on Purpose
If you’re not overdressed, you’re underdressed. I will always be the most overdressed person in a room (but probably not in the stands) because I like it. I like to dress like I have some place better to be later (which is at home).
Romanticizing My Own Home
As everyone should do. This is the home we chose. The home we built piece by piece, day by day, moment by moment. It’s the place that represents who we are as a family. It’s our style, our safe haven, the place where the vast majority of our best moments, best memories, and best times occur, and I’m just over here wondering why more people aren’t in love with being home.
This is the place where every single thing, every singe corner, every single curated piece of furniture and décor is exactly what I love the most, exactly what I want to surround myself with, and exactly what brings me joy. Not one thing in this home was ‘settled’ for (just ask the guy who built our pool and really hated every moment of me deciding I wanted to upgrade everything from the tiles that required hiring a special guy who takes weeks to cut and install custom tiles to the dark finish of the pool that requires more maintenance to the custom design of the pavers that required more work, more cutting, more time, and custom height of the screen that required the screen guys to spend more time here and work harder creating a design that works).
Everything in this home is exactly what I love the most, and I love being here. I love waking up here. I love pool days at home, hosting dinner for my friends, having quality time here with my family. Sitting on my front porch rockers with the scent of climbing jasmine from the pillars while I have a cup of coffee or a glass of wine with my husband. The way the sun shines through all of our doors and windows, the lighting, the colors, the décor, the vibe…all of it. I love it here so much.
Choosing Family Over Everything
Listen: I love a date night. I love a quick getaway with my husband. But you know what else I love? Taking the kids with us. Why? Because our time with them is fleeting. Our time with one another is infinite. We have our entire lives to spend together, but right now in the midst of watching our daughter go through her graduation season and prepare to leave home for good, we are reminded daily that we only have so many weekends, so many vacations, so many moments in which it’s easy to all be together. And we want to make as many amazing memories with the kids as possible right now so that they’ll hopefully want to come home as often as possible as adults to make more.
We don’t need a weekly date night or to try and free ourselves of our children every weekend. We had seven years of that before we had kids, we have at least a date night every month, and we are together 24/7 thanks to my husband’s career. We have forever to spend together, and right now we want to spend as much time as a family as we can because we are painfully reminded how little time that really is.
Intentional Boujie Behaviors
Choosing better is where I’m at in life right now. It’s not about the cost or the concept. It’s about quality. I’m not settling for subpar ingredients or fabrics. I don’t want fast fashion or mass produced décor. I want the best.
Quiet Mornings Over Late Nights
Mornings are best. A slow start is always going to find me over a late night. Not to say I don’t enjoy a late night on occasion, but late to me is 9 pm, so do with that what you will.
Not Saving Things for Special Occasions
I absolutely do not understand that concept. Saving the expensive champagne for a special occasion? Every day is a special occasion! Only wearing your ‘good’ perfume on special occasions? Girl…you need a signature scent and wear it every single day because it is the special occasion. Just celebrate life now. Don’t save things for later.
Small Circles, but Stellar Energy
“A friend to all is a friend to none,” and that’s the damn truth. Small circles are discerning. Being everyone’s friend? That’s great if you really enjoy it, but I’ll go ahead and let you know it screams red flag to me. No one is liked by everyone unless they’re working overtime people pleasing and personality shifting to fit the setting. And people who actually want to be liked by everyone? That scares me.
Small circles have better energy because they’re filled only with people who love you for who you are. They’re easier. They’re more fun. And they’re just stellar.
ROMO
Some people have FOMO (fear of missing out), but I’m so heavily into ROMO (relief of missing out) that it’s not even funny. Please, understand that I value and appreciate your invitation, but if it’s not an immediate yes in my mind, then it’s an immediate no.
Letting Life Look Different Than I Thought it Would
Does today Tiffany have everything life 10 years ago Tiffany wanted? Yes, she does, and more. But does she also have a life that she never even imagined having 10 years ago? Absolutely. The things I valued back then are so vastly different than the things I value now, and I love it. I love embracing that.
Tiffany Raiford 