Happy 18th Birthday, Addison Grace.
Eighteen years ago, you came into this world a 6 lbs. 15 oz. little blonde with the biggest blue eyes and the sweetest face. You changed our world forever. I thought I loved your daddy before we had you, but you changed the game. The moment I watched him hold you for the first time, and every moment after that, I loved him even more. And you? You became the light of our lives the moment we found out about you.
There was nothing about you that wasn’t absolutely perfect, and we spent our time staring at you, imagining who you might be someday. Would you be an athlete? Would you be kind? Would you love school and make amazing friends? Would you always be so sweet, or would you one day become a teenager who would roll your eyes at us and tell us we are so unfair because we wouldn’t let you date a boy or go to a party?
- You did become an athlete
- You have always been kind
- You do love school
- You did make amazing friends
- You have always been sweet
- You never rolled your eyes at us, told us you hated us, or said that we are unfair
- You picked a darling young man to be your boyfriend, and we’ve loved watching him bring you so much joy (and being on the receiving end of the joy he’s also brought our family)
We watched you become an amazing big sister (three times). We watched you become an amazing cheerleader and flag football player. We watched you graduate with your first college degree at 17, and we watched you graduate from high school two weeks later with every honor imaginable. We watched you get accepted into your dream university.
We’ve watched you grow into the most beautiful young woman both inside and out, and there is nothing about you that doesn’t fill us with so much love and so much joy. You are everything we hoped you would become and so much more. A hard worker. Loyal. Dedicated. Damn funny. Respectful. Mature. You are such a joy to us, and we love you more than we could ever express to you with just words.
And today…today you turn 18. Today you officially become an adult. Today, you enter a new chapter of your life that is going to be the most exciting, most amazing chapter you can imagine. While I have so many mixed feelings about you being an adult (because I am going to miss you so much when you leave for college and then head off into the adult world), I cannot even begin to tell you how excited we are to see what your future holds. To one day watch daddy walk you down the aisle at your wedding. To one day hold your babies for the very first time and watch you become an amazing mother. To see you succeed in your career and change the world. There is nothing – nothing – you cannot do if you choose to do it. Proud is such an understatement.
With that said, here are the 18 things I want you to know on your 18th birthday.
Failure is a stepping stone
               Failure is not a stop sign. It’s the best lesson you’ll ever learn. And you will fail. A million times. Just remember to take it as a lesson, learn from it, and use it as a stepping stone for success.
Comparison is the thief of joy
               Cliché, but so true. Never compare yourself to anyone else. No one is living your life. No one is on the same path. No one is on the same timeline. You are exactly where you need to be in life, every step of the way.
No is a complete sentence
The end. No explanation. No reasoning. If the answer is no, no is all you have to say.
Time is nonrefundable
You don’t get it back, so make sure you are enjoying the moment and not wishing it away, waiting for the next moment, and not enjoying it.
Learn to be comfortable being alone
               Go to dinner alone. Sit at the bar and read a book, write, work, or people-watch. It’s such a freeing experience to be comfortable being alone and being your own company.
Your network is your net worth
Build connections. Meet people. Find a mentor. These are the people who will make it easier for you to open the doors you want to open in your life.
Your health is the most important
Take care of yourself. Take care of your body. Treat it well, and nourish it. But don’t forget to indulge on occasion. But a strong body will take care of you forever.
Listen more than you speak
It’s easier to learn when you listen than it is when you speak. Never listen just to respond. Listen to hear.
What people think of you is none of your business
You will never, ever make every single person happy, so do yourself a favor and make yourself happy. Who cares if it bothers others or if other people aren’t happy with your decisions? As long as you are, that’s all that matters. Make sure your energy is going where your energy is needed.
Protect your energy
Life is too short to spend it with people who leave you feeling drained and tired.
Never be afraid to admit when you make a mistake
Or when you are wrong. No one is perfect. Apologize, and then do better next time. Everyone makes mistakes. Learn from them. But don’t dwell on them.
Keep learning
You will never regret becoming more knowledgeable. Learning is the best gift you can give to yourself, so never stop.
Trust your instincts
They’re rarely wrong.
Have fun
Life is too short not to make the most of every moment. Have fun. Make memories.
Family is the most important part of your life
Never forget that. They are the people who love you and support you and want to see you succeed. We will celebrate with you, grieve with you, and be here for you, always. But also remember that when you get married and have your own family, they are your priority. And that’s okay – that’s how it should be.
Dress up
               It’s always better to be overdressed than underdressed. And life is just more fun when you are in a fabulous outfit.
Travel
               Don’t stop traveling. Keep seeing the world. Make new memories in new places, and always remember that you are always welcome on any trip we take, even when you’re old and gray.
Think before you speak
Not everything deserves a response. Not everything deserves acknowledgement. You cannot take back the words you say in the heat of the moment, so always think before you speak.
I know you already know these things, but these are the things I want to remind you of on your first day as an adult.
But the most important thing I want you to remember is that daddy, your sisters, your brother, and I love you so much. To the moon and back. And we are so proud of you. Happy Birthday, Addybug. I hope today is the best day ever.
Tiffany Raiford 